BREAKING NEWS- An extraterrestrial has been spotted in Westfield, MA. Students at Westfield State University witnessed an E.T. in the woods behind campus at around 7:30 Tuesday night.
Students became alarmed when they saw someone moving in the shadows, apparently naked. They initially thought it might be a freshman who fell prey to what college students call “Turn-Up Tuesday” and somehow lost all of his clothes in his inebriated state.
This rumor was quickly dispelled when a student shined the flashlight from her smartphone on the figured and discovered it was blindingly white and about 3 feet taller than any freshman could possibly be. The female student snapped the above picture before realizing that what she saw was no student and immediately ran back to her dorm along with her friends to call campus security. However, by the time security got to the scene, there was no creature to be found, causing people to speculate that the visitor may have been picked up by a U.F.O.
Experts are saying that by the way witnesses described the E.T., it was most likely of the “Tall White” alien race. Tall Whites have previously been sighted in the United States but nowhere near the northeast region of the country until now, which could mean more sightings to come.
CORRECTION- After further investigation, the creature lurking in the woods behind Westfield State turned out to be an inebriated 18-year old male freshman who had fallen prey to “Turn-Up Tuesday” after all. He had taken his clothes off because he was “hot” and wound up outside because “it wouldn’t be hot out there”. In fact, it was 34 degrees that night.
The student who mistakenly identified the boy as a Tall White revised her previous statement after seeing him the next day, realizing he must have been standing on a rock and was just a really pale Irish-American.